Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Days at work and sleepless nights

Let me begin by letting you know that this is my very first blog from my Nokia (wow, it just predicted that I was about to type 'Nokia') Lumia 920. I am already so impressed by it that I am trying to do all the work that I can do without turning on my desktop by this little powerful machine.
The past 1.5 years at Noxel had been really wonderful and hectic at the same time. The past three weeks however I had been working my ass off up to the limits. Sleepless nights programming and designing and planning. Been handling my department, which handles two of our most ambitious projects. Apart from that I have been working under direct supervision of my manager to propose the complete next generation network package to one of our big clients, a 4 block 14 story automated hotel. There are side projects beside all the big things we are doing too. About three 2,3 story houses, partially automated. Well that's too much boring stuff for you to read.
Have you ever noticed when you are too sleepy at work or while watching a movie but get extra energy out of nowhere? When I started to write the blog, I was sleepy as hell, but now I just cant stop shouting out my 'brain fart'. Its 12am and I have only slept five hours in the past 72 hours. So I better go now.

Saturday, March 30, 2013

I am high

I am high. I am even high when I am writing this blog. I might not be able to remember what I said at the beginning of the blog, at the end of the blog. and I am trying so hard to write like it has been written right.

Here are the circumstances of being high. This is my very first experience of being high for a long period of time. I forget what I did in the past few minutes. I live in the moment. Like the dog who is sitting beside me. I am so afraid that I might forget why would I have to write a blog.

The momentary feeling: I am trying very hard to get the diary right, as I am so high in the sky.

These are what happened while I was drunk and high, as much as I can remember:

I drank too hard. Vodka and a German beer. My colleague started to sing and I started to call my friend in the UK. We talked. I remember that I told him: "Please record this piece, you won't regret it." "We could use it in our research of understanding the human brain. While I perform an experiment on myself. " I said.

I can concentrate on what I want. At time I get so intensely into something that I can easily say I am into it, totally.

My colleague and friend whispered something. Something about going home and that he can drive and if he doesn't go back, he would be murdered by his girl friend. While I was leaving Alireza's place I saw two of us in the lift. while I decided to go back to the house. Salman was singing. We kept drinking.

I was afraid that I might get lost if I go back with a drunk guy. I remembered to take my key holder and my cells. How could I remember all that without remembering when I even start to write this blog while my girlfriend is sleeping and I am writing this blog while I am so high I can't even see the keyboard properly.

I just started to self-correct my blog. Woo getting high is so good.... I told my friend on the phone to record me. and I have to go back to my colleagues. I forgot. I like being high. Oh I went back to the house because I was not ready to to lose this nice feeling  the feeling of not being able to remember anything. To care for anybody. To think about the past and the future.

One scene I remember seeing in my dreams. The planet earth. The photo on the on the TV while playing DVD tracks. So calming, so relaxing. And I have to go. I am ready to go now, to sleep beside my girl friend. the one who stayed home while I had fun with my friends.

I am sleepy. Oh I recorded a few moments on the actions. I kept them to study on. I don't even remember what I just said [wrote] was about. Even though I am high. I can figure out the errors I make while writing a blog in a "high" state. Oh I am high. I am not drunk. Oh human brain, a brain which can figure out itself. Magic of evolution.